Redallnite
02-28-02, 08:13PM
~ More than one living relative is named after a southern civil war general.
~ Your front porch collapses and more than six dogs are killed.
~ Your home has more miles on it than your car.
~ You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d'ouevre.
~ There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.
~ You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
~ Fewer than half of your cars run.
~ The primary color of your car is "bondo".
~ You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
~ Your family tree doesn't fork.
~ Your hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
~ Your mother has been involved in a fistfight at a high school sports event.
~ You've ever barbecued Spam on the grill.
~ The best way to keep things cold is to leave 'em in the shade.
~ The neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lights.
~ Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
~ You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.
~ Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.
~ The rear tires on your car are at least twice as wide as the front ones.
~ You consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.
~ You prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
~ You use the term `over yonder' more than once a month.
~ The diploma hanging in your den contains the words "Trucking Institute".
~ Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.
~ Your favorite Christmas present, was a painting on black velvet.
~ Your front porch collapses and more than six dogs are killed.
~ Your home has more miles on it than your car.
~ You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d'ouevre.
~ There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.
~ You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
~ Fewer than half of your cars run.
~ The primary color of your car is "bondo".
~ You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
~ Your family tree doesn't fork.
~ Your hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
~ Your mother has been involved in a fistfight at a high school sports event.
~ You've ever barbecued Spam on the grill.
~ The best way to keep things cold is to leave 'em in the shade.
~ The neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lights.
~ Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
~ You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.
~ Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.
~ The rear tires on your car are at least twice as wide as the front ones.
~ You consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.
~ You prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
~ You use the term `over yonder' more than once a month.
~ The diploma hanging in your den contains the words "Trucking Institute".
~ Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.
~ Your favorite Christmas present, was a painting on black velvet.