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I know people who love someone who's the exact opposite. Personally, my last boyfriend was that way and it was a living hell. Jake and I have a lot of similarities and we still are able to discuss any subject and give different insights.
Which do you prefer and why?
Poseidon
02-20-04, 08:35AM
Hmmm.... I don't like it when the person I am going out with is just like me, but I don't like a complete opposite, either. If she were just like me, then relationship could get boring after a while. A complete opposite, while can be very interesting, can lead to a lot of fighting. I like a mix of both. :)
We need a third option, Diva!
I would agree with Pos on that, but with a slight modification—if the person is just like me, we would fight for dominance all the time. If the person is my complete opposite, he’d end up ground into the dirt under my heel.
Currently I am in a relationship with a wonderful sweetie, and, considering its good times/bad times ratio and the healthy (though undesirable) number of fights (it’s unhealthy to have none, btw, which might be a topic for a thread in itself), we are both very happy.
I think that the secret to that happiness is being neither opposites nor twins, but in being the pieces of the puzzle that fit together. I would not say that it means we ARE opposites, because fitting together in relationships means a good mix of compromise, being happy with the same things, liking to do similar things, but at the same time, balancing each other’s personalities out—in our case, he makes my famous temper much milder just by being there, and I tend to make him more aggressive and organized. It works out well.
So yes, did I mention that we need a third option on that poll! :D
Nope. You need to deal with the options I put up on this one. I'm not talking a rapist/murderer... then again, look to see what your opposite views are. There are people who have healthy relationships with people who's views are opposite. Democrat vs Repuplican, Capital punishment for vs against. Look into what your strongest beliefs are and then think of the opposite.
Again, I am not talking nun vs Jeffrey Dahmer.
OK, with the above correction, I choose similar. :p
warza bidul
02-20-04, 10:23AM
Symbiosis rules. Simple as
difference with adaptability is the best.
thestarsfall
02-20-04, 10:40AM
Different.....im annoyed by one of me and if there was a guy who was a same as me i would just be scared.....i need variety
MeLsWeEtiE
02-20-04, 05:52PM
Similar...me and Ben are so alike. We have so many things in common that it's scary. BUT, at the same time, we're different. We compliment each other. He has taught me to "grow a backbone" and I have taught him the meaning of compromise. He's taught me to relax and enjoy life, and I'm helping him learn how to be not as easy going, to actually give a fuck. lol It's a wonderful balance.
kittyroze
02-20-04, 06:13PM
I dated two religious conservative republicans. I am an atheist, liberal, democrat. SO, I've determined that I will not put up with dating someone who is my opposite ever again. It just leaves me pissed off all the time.
I want a mixture of the two, but more different than me than alike. I've been single so long, I still want my free time, so I'd want to be able to go do something on my own every now and then. If we're different, I can use the, "But you hate fishing" excuse to get away for a little while.
* Diva stomps her foot
ONE or THE OTHER!!! Jeesh.
whitecrow
02-22-04, 03:10PM
* whitecrow plays nice.
Similar.
Being one who has dated his complete opposite, and that was a terrible mistake. I just find the conflicting points of view just create issues. I mean, not everything is going to be in common, but similarities, when they run deep can from great bonds.
Walking with one who is your opposite in most things will, more often than not, give you headaches. God bless similarity.
Amen.
Originally posted by Boozer
I want a mixture of the two, but more different than me than alike. I've been single so long, I still want my free time, so I'd want to be able to go do something on my own every now and then. If we're different, I can use the, "But you hate fishing" excuse to get away for a little while.
If I only have those two options, then I don't pick either. I don't want someone similar to me, or the exact opposite, either.
Boozer, that is what I tried at first. She bullied me into choosing, later! :p
I prefer someone similar in likes and dislikes. It's easier to find something to enjoy together for one.
Don't get me wrong, I love seeing the differences in people and I love expanding who I am. But for me, when it comes to relationships, I need someone who has the same values, the same kind of personality. Like, with my husband now, when we were dating it was awesome, we were both still "kids". Now that we actually HAD a kid, I grew up and he didn't - which causes more problems than you would want! - oops...started ranting...
Anyway, yeah, someone similar.
* Ice Man is married to an exact opposite. Nothing that I am interested in appeals to her. This has it's pros and cons. I like being alone when instilled in a task. If you want something done correctly, do it yourself. Then again, it often feels that I forking the bill for a roomate. That sucks.
I agree - sometimes it's nice to be alone when you are doing something. My husband, he has no knowledge on how to pay bills...or clean for that matter. That in turn makes me feel like I have TWO children instead of one....it gets SO annoying. However, I feel that he is nothing but a roomate due to other problems in our marriage..but I definately feel it.
MeLsWeEtiE
03-04-04, 09:02PM
Similar. :shutup:
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