Diva
04-10-02, 06:42PM
I Stopped To Smell The Flowers... And A Bee Flew Up My Nose
I wonder how many other people could give a rats ass whether or not these 'reality' show rejects find success when their time is up. To date I am proud to say that I have never flipped on any of these shows. Although I'd like to flip off the idiot who thought this stupid idea up. The survivors had to endure the brutality of natures' elements by day and middle class accommodations by night. Truly a 'survival' of the fittest, wouldn't you say? I hear they trained at the Holiday Inn. Then there's those live-in shows. How ridiculous. Supposedly they have to 'endure' each other. First off, would you really want to admit that you made the cut for a show that looks for the most obnoxious people who they wouldn't live with unless someone paid them to do it. Can you say 'L-O-S-E-R'? .
There is a difference between being a pervert and being 'sexually aware". I'm at the counter this morning, getting my first injection of life I.E. coffee. I start looking through the bananas. The guy behind me has this big ole fucking smile on his face, like I was putting them in my mouth to check the size. I said [mind you, there is no coffee in me yet] "Something amuse you?" He says, "I always enjoy watching a woman fondle fruit." My demure response: "Let me get this straight... You get off on chicks checking fruit for freshness?" The fool didn't let up. "We.. Well, It IS a banana..." Slam: "Yes, the banana is roughly the shape of a penis. Although I wouldn't touch a yellow/green penis with a ten foot pole. But what makes you think I'd insert a piece of fruit anywhere but in my mouth? Personally, the idea of biting off a piece and chewing and chewing it doesn't seem that arousing... but that's just me." He tilted his pelvis back, "Uh... No, that doesn't sound too hot." With that I got my large cup of coffee and slowly entered the world of the pleasant. Asshole.
Fun Links and News Tidbits
And the most sexually happy nation is... the Ukrainians.No shit Sherlock. It's colder than Hell after Hillary gives Clinton a blow job.... Russian sniper chick wants to kill Chechen rebels to buy apartment. How charming... Panties made for men... MANTIES... Hahahahahahahahahaha. HAH!... Cow to give birth to cloned ox on endangered species list.Next we're gonna try for John Holmes. Hot damn! Talk about your long labor.... A Dutch teenager has won a contest for looking like his dog. Is this really a contest you would choose to enter? Much less publically own up to.... Over one hundred German shoppers storm store wearing nothing but their underwear. Considering the Germans eating habits, this ain't a jerk off moment. Trust me.... Beatles' guru to create yogic flier defence shield. All he needs is 40,000 yogis and "peace-loving billionaires" to donate $1 billion dollars. As if anyone would think it would work. Two words, man. Two words... John Lennon. Manure sculpture provides place for meditation. Well now, those Bulgarians aren't the brightest bulb in the box, are they? Sitting in a room made of crap isn't what I call relaxing. It just proves the point: One man's reflection is another man's pile of crap.
I wonder how many other people could give a rats ass whether or not these 'reality' show rejects find success when their time is up. To date I am proud to say that I have never flipped on any of these shows. Although I'd like to flip off the idiot who thought this stupid idea up. The survivors had to endure the brutality of natures' elements by day and middle class accommodations by night. Truly a 'survival' of the fittest, wouldn't you say? I hear they trained at the Holiday Inn. Then there's those live-in shows. How ridiculous. Supposedly they have to 'endure' each other. First off, would you really want to admit that you made the cut for a show that looks for the most obnoxious people who they wouldn't live with unless someone paid them to do it. Can you say 'L-O-S-E-R'? .
There is a difference between being a pervert and being 'sexually aware". I'm at the counter this morning, getting my first injection of life I.E. coffee. I start looking through the bananas. The guy behind me has this big ole fucking smile on his face, like I was putting them in my mouth to check the size. I said [mind you, there is no coffee in me yet] "Something amuse you?" He says, "I always enjoy watching a woman fondle fruit." My demure response: "Let me get this straight... You get off on chicks checking fruit for freshness?" The fool didn't let up. "We.. Well, It IS a banana..." Slam: "Yes, the banana is roughly the shape of a penis. Although I wouldn't touch a yellow/green penis with a ten foot pole. But what makes you think I'd insert a piece of fruit anywhere but in my mouth? Personally, the idea of biting off a piece and chewing and chewing it doesn't seem that arousing... but that's just me." He tilted his pelvis back, "Uh... No, that doesn't sound too hot." With that I got my large cup of coffee and slowly entered the world of the pleasant. Asshole.
Fun Links and News Tidbits
And the most sexually happy nation is... the Ukrainians.No shit Sherlock. It's colder than Hell after Hillary gives Clinton a blow job.... Russian sniper chick wants to kill Chechen rebels to buy apartment. How charming... Panties made for men... MANTIES... Hahahahahahahahahaha. HAH!... Cow to give birth to cloned ox on endangered species list.Next we're gonna try for John Holmes. Hot damn! Talk about your long labor.... A Dutch teenager has won a contest for looking like his dog. Is this really a contest you would choose to enter? Much less publically own up to.... Over one hundred German shoppers storm store wearing nothing but their underwear. Considering the Germans eating habits, this ain't a jerk off moment. Trust me.... Beatles' guru to create yogic flier defence shield. All he needs is 40,000 yogis and "peace-loving billionaires" to donate $1 billion dollars. As if anyone would think it would work. Two words, man. Two words... John Lennon. Manure sculpture provides place for meditation. Well now, those Bulgarians aren't the brightest bulb in the box, are they? Sitting in a room made of crap isn't what I call relaxing. It just proves the point: One man's reflection is another man's pile of crap.