Worst Defence Ever

[Amaurote]

I've seen a few pathetic defences to criminal charges lately, but this (http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2008/feb/12/ukcrime2) "I found this recently murdered body lying around so I had sex with it" justification is so bad it's almost laughable - if it wasn't for the awful severity of the crime.


http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2005/09/27/model256.jpg

Actually, this (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article3197011.ece) is almost as pisspoor: his defence is that it was "just a coincidence" that he'd slept with each of the women near the time of their murder. It's bad enough being convicted of an absolutely horrible crime in a court of law, I'd have thought, but being generally known throughout the country as thoroughly stupid, too? They should shoot their lawyers, then themselves.

[Beat_Criminal]

Wait a minute... let me get this straight. This guy's defense was that when he saw 18 year old Sally Anne Bowman's body, covered in stab wounds, he decided to have sex with it? He claims he didn't kill her but admitted to fucking her corpse? What the fuck is wrong with people? And what the hell is a Ford Mondeo?

-B

[James]

I'd laugh if it turned out that it really was a co-incidence that the women he slept with were killed. Although, it's not too hard to imagine that another person, a jilted lover perhaps, could be following the guy and killing people he sleeps with.

I'm all for punishing people, but the reason people are assumed innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt isn't to help people get off the hook, it's there to make sure the person who actually did the crime is the one punished.


Also, judging by how many paramedics either cop a feel or snap a pic of hot chicks who have been mangled but have intact naughty bits, I wouldn't say it's that hard to imagine that the first thought that popped into his head was "this is a good idea".

[mine]

A Ford mondeo is a european designed and made medium sized sedan.

[Bones]

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. How many of you can honestly say that you have never engaged in sexual relations with a corpse? Oh..... None of you have........ Shit!!!

[Isotrip]

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. How many of you can honestly say that you have never engaged in sexual relations with a corpse? Oh..... None of you have........ Shit!!!


*Skeezy lil bug-eyed man in the third row of the jury looks around really quick moves arm in nervous twitch*

:eek:

[trekbugging]

hey joe look theres a dead girl with stab wounds all over her, but look at those tits and her pants are off--lets have sex with her---

noooooo noooooo ewwwwwewwwwww


how about, oh my fucking god is that a dead body, holy shit-poor girl and looks like someone raped her--call the police NOW-- don't touch her or get to near so the police can get all evidence around her-- shit seems like shes young too--that's such a shame

[Bassmama]

I know rigor causes stiffness, but NOT where I'd want it!

[Amaurote]

His defence accomplished something even more unbelievable today - it grew even more moronic:


The man accused of murdering 18-year-old model Sally Anne Bowman today told the court of his regret at having sex with her dead body.

Mark Dixie, 37, admitted taking "full advantage" of the teenager but claimed he had initially believed his victim had "passed out or fallen over".

The former pub chef told how he had been on a four-day cocaine binge when he spotted Bowman lying outside her home in the early hours of the morning.

He said he did not know "what went through my mind" but that all he saw was a pair of legs "with a shirt put down to the waist".

Speaking at Dixie's Old Bailey trial, his counsel, Anthony Glass, QC, asked him: "Do you mean you had sexual intercourse with her?" Dixie replied: "Yes."

Glass asked: "Did you think she was dead or unconscious?" Dixie said: "I would not have expected to see anyone dead in that street. I thought she might have passed out or fallen over."

Bowman, who was working as a hairdresser and part-time model, was found in a pool of blood in the driveway of her home in Croydon, south London, in September 2005.

The prosecution says Dixie stabbed her seven times and raped her as she lay dead or dying.

Today, Dixie told the jury he considered himself the "life and soul of the party" with a large appetite for illegal drugs.

"I am like a vacuum cleaner when it comes to cocaine. I always need more," he told the court.

Dixie described how he had left a friend's flat at around 4.30am on the night of the incident to buy more cocaine. He saw Bowman lying in front of her house in Blenheim Crescent.

Asked what he thought, he said: "I have gone over it during the last three years. I don't know what went through my mind.

"I crouched down from behind where the legs were. I took full advantage of someone and I should not have done it. All I saw was a pair of legs, shirt put down to the waist and I took advantage of her."

Glass asked him: "Did you, in fact, realise she was dead?" Dixie replied: "After a while."

The court heard how Dixie then panicked and attempted to hide traces of his DNA by placing cement dust on the victim's body.

He ran back to his friend's flat where he smoked cannabis to try to calm down, slept for a few hours and then went out drinking.

Bowman's mother, Linda, sat in tears a few feet away from Dixie and later left the court as he continued his evidence.

Earlier in the trial, prosecutor Brian Altman said the defendant had murdered Bowman for his own sexual gratification and then concocted a "ludicrous" defence "borne out of desperation".

Dixie, of no fixed address, denies murder. The trial continues.

Guardian (http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2008/feb/19/ukcrime2)

Hmmm, yes. Passed out = brutally murdered person with stab wounds all over her. Yes, we've all made that mistake before. I myself once held an entire conversation about the football results with a bloke once, only to discover I was standing next to a sarcophagus, and the chap was in fact a 2000-year-old mummy.

[trekbugging]

"so maybe if i tell them i was just FUCKING stupid and fucked a dead girl --maybe they will not believe i actually killed her"
jeezee-- either way your a TOTAL moron, one way your a necropheliac and drugged out arsehole --the other way is your a total drugged out moron who kills and is also into necrophiliac-- what a choice

[Diva]

"Did you realize she was dead?"
"After a while..."

OMFG.... I swear if this guy doesn't get the maximum PLUS time for being stupid... How can you not notice a pool of blood? He was alert enough to go for more drugs... then he was alert enough for that. I just for horrible that the poor mother sat through that.

[Bones]

He was on a 4 day coke binge. After a few days without sleep and being higher than a kite it's possible he hallucinated that she was enjoying it.
That's still no excuse. But it can work for the defense.

[James]

It really is amazing how easy it would be to set someone up for murder though. Just kill random people that they have been in contact with, maybe a couple that they were having a conflict with, maybe plant a tiny bit of hair or something in a couple of the scenes, or a used condom out of their trash into a nearby dumpster... haha I watch too much CSI...