View Full Version : I Am A Fucking Idiot
Earlier this afternoon, I was in the lab finishing up an audio assignment. The assignment requires you to wear a set of headphones with a microphone so that you can hear yourself pronouncing the sentences. I dropped my pen, bent down to pick it up, and the microphone whacked the desk like a ton of bricks, reverberating in my eardrums.
I screamed in agony, which scared the shit out of the girl sitting next to me(she screamed), and drew the attention of the lab.
What stupid stuff have you done lately?
Unforgiven
09-12-07, 08:43PM
I never do anything sutpid.
It would take up to much space on here to post it all.
caufield
09-12-07, 10:37PM
Once, I was standing next to kitty, then I remembered something and said, "OH SHIT!" and ran out of the house. Kitty was terrified. A couple days earlier, she asked me about a missing shirt. The reason I said oh shit and ran out of the house was that I remembered putting the clothes outside on the clothes line. I scared the crap out of her.
I do the same thing to Diva all the time. I'm getting better about it, but I'll still slip every once in a while.
"GODDAMMIT!"
"...WHAT?"
"I....dropped a slice of avocado on the ceramic and have to clean it up."
"Oh god, well, let's just call the CDC and get them in here. Hang on, let me get the phone so that I can call 911, and then KTLA..."
"I was...didn't mean it like..."
Amaurote
09-13-07, 12:12PM
I usually sit next to a lady who works in a place next door to the site where I work - one where I worked continuously until a redeployment about a year ago. She started talking about a girl I know there, and how she'd announced she was leaving in a few weeks. So, being the cheery, cheesy sentimental chap I am, I sent off an email bidding her farewell and saying how much she'd be missed.
She replied about an hour later, thanking me for all my kind words, but added, "One problem, though - I'm not leaving." Turns out I'd completely misheard the surname. This is very embarrassing, but I thanked my stars that I never go there any more anyway. Then I looked at the timetable - in a quirk of fate one of my colleagues based there is off next Monday - guess which eejit is covering?
Beat_Criminal
09-13-07, 12:53PM
A few months ago I was dating this chick and she had a friend who was pregnant. Of course, she has two friends with the same name, and me being the smart guy that I am, forgot this fact. So when I see the non-pregnant friend (who has a few extra pounds but is very sensitive about it), well, you can guess where it goes from here... yeah, I looked real cool.
-B
kittyroze
09-14-07, 12:11AM
Me: Hey honey, when was the last time I did something stupid?
Caufield: I can't think of anything.
Me: That is the right answer. Good boyfriend. Here's a cookie :cookie:
caufield
09-14-07, 12:12AM
YAY!!!! COOKIE!!!
trekbugging
09-14-07, 04:55AM
Me: Hey honey, when was the last time I did something stupid?
Caufield: I can't think of anything.
Me: That is the right answer. Good boyfriend. Here's a cookie :cookie:
remember man wanting to get laid has a flash memory of 15 seconds--hahahahahahahah
thestarsfall
09-14-07, 07:44AM
Well this morning I turned off my alarm and then decided to nap for another 10 mins or so....I wake up and it is 3 mins before class starts and it takes me at least 15 mins to get ready and another 8 to get to class...and class is only 50 mins so really there is no point...
Turns out I'd completely misheard the surname. This is very embarrassing, but I thanked my stars that I never go there any more anyway. Then I looked at the timetable - in a quirk of fate one of my colleagues based there is off next Monday - guess which eejit is covering?
Oh man... that has happened to me a few times. The worst was having to sit next to the person for twelve hours after said blip. At least you didn't congradulate her on being pregnant *looks at BC's comment*
A few months ago I was dating this chick and she had a friend who was pregnant. Of course, she has two friends with the same name, and me being the smart guy that I am, forgot this fact. So when I see the non-pregnant friend (who has a few extra pounds but is very sensitive about it), well, you can guess where it goes from here... yeah, I looked real cool.
-B
Again this has happened to me. Not quite as bad, but still... I saw a woman on the street that looked like she was about 7 to 8 months pregnant. I smiled and asked when the baby was due. Her response: "Three months ago". I thought she was going to rip my head off. I apologetically crawled away.
remember man wanting to get laid has a flash memory of 15 seconds--hahahahahahahah
Tell me about it...
remember man wanting to get laid has a flash memory of 15 seconds--hahahahahahahah
I had a witty comment for this. But I forgot what it was.
I had a witty comment for this. But I forgot what it was. Lol, great one Bones. :D
dynamitt
09-14-07, 11:44PM
funny with the pregnancy comments. I was almost 30 weeks pregnant (thats like 7 months) before most parents in my child care center dared to ask if I was expecting.
And diva I had the opposite happening to me, I was about 6 months along when a woman asked how my baby was doing. I answer he is oki and patted my tummy. She then looked shocked at me and said - oh you haven't had your baby yet.
Let me see something dumb..
I went to the store the other day and put the key in my jacket pocket. When i had finished shopping I thought to myself I better put the key in my bag so I don't lose it. So I did. I walked home and when I was almost home I met out neighbor. I said hi to him and walked towards out door while grabbing for my key in my pocket. Of course the key was not there.. I panicked and was sure I had lost the key somewhere on the road. I started to walk back towards the store and I meet my neighbor again. He asked me what was wrong and I answer I had lost my key. He then asked; did you check your bag? And then I remember...
Lol, great one Bones. :D
huh?
huh?:doh: don't tell me you didn't realise that this comment
I had a witty comment for this. But I forgot what it was.wasn't meant as a joke. If you don't get it go and look at what you where commenting on!
kittyroze
09-15-07, 01:02AM
I finally did something stupid.
While getting ready to go have a delicious and fun dinner with Diva and JakeD, I turned on my hair straightening iron and set it down on the couch (on a fire retardant couch cover, set so the hot ceramic wouldn't touch anything directly). I figured I'd leave it there for a second to get hot while I went to find my hairbrush.
I walk away, grab my hairbrush, then get distracted by something on the tv (or maybe it was something shiny). I go to the fridge, grab a rootbeer, head back to the couch and sit down. On the very, very hot straightening iron. I was wearing a thin robe, therefore I burned my ass.
dynamitt
09-15-07, 03:24AM
ouch!
Unforgiven
09-15-07, 08:24AM
I told you that if you kept hanging around Jake, things would happen and you wouldn't be able to sit for a week.
trekbugging
09-15-07, 09:33AM
poor caufield, no ass for a week--hahahahahahaha
dynamitt
09-15-07, 10:06PM
Me: Hey honey, when was the last time I did something stupid?
Caufield: I can't think of anything.
Me: That is the right answer. Good boyfriend. Here's a cookie :cookie:
in our house the conversation will go like this
Me: hey tell me one thing I have done that is stupid
pepe: I have to pick just one thing??
I finally did something stupid.
While getting ready to go have a delicious and fun dinner with Diva and JakeD, I turned on my hair straightening iron and set it down on the couch (on a fire retardant couch cover, set so the hot ceramic wouldn't touch anything directly). I figured I'd leave it there for a second to get hot while I went to find my hairbrush.
I walk away, grab my hairbrush, then get distracted by something on the tv (or maybe it was something shiny). I go to the fridge, grab a rootbeer, head back to the couch and sit down. On the very, very hot straightening iron. I was wearing a thin robe, therefore I burned my ass.
Good job, King Edward!
I finally did something stupid.
While getting ready to go have a delicious and fun dinner with Diva and JakeD, I turned on my hair straightening iron and set it down on the couch (on a fire retardant couch cover, set so the hot ceramic wouldn't touch anything directly). I figured I'd leave it there for a second to get hot while I went to find my hairbrush.
I walk away, grab my hairbrush, then get distracted by something on the tv (or maybe it was something shiny). I go to the fridge, grab a rootbeer, head back to the couch and sit down. On the very, very hot straightening iron. I was wearing a thin robe, therefore I burned my ass.
:lolrotf: I think I just hurt myself laughing. Maybe Caufield will kiss it and make it better?
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