Diva
04-05-02, 12:44PM
In Space No One Can Smell Your Fart
I'm in a funky-assed mood today. Damn! I woke up crankier Then a chick on a diet PMS-ing. After chugging a few mugs o' coffee, it mellowed me to rant mode. Woo hoo! Too bad I was too lazy to invest that time, eh? I got this off the wall [but in a nice way] email. It said, "Thank you for existing... you kind, generous soul." Now THAT'S a compliment. Then I started thinking... What did I do? So I checked out the date: May 22nd. Hmmpf. So I emailed them back and asked if I still fit the description. But hey, at one point I did, so there. Shut up. Then I get a second email about SnuffX... asking if I would host it because it's closed. I freaked and went to the site. Nope, still there. What the hell is going on with the email? Oh hell, enough about that.
Why do people act so G-d damned surprised when I tell them I haven't seen any of the reality shows? Nor do I have a desire to. You can get arrested for not helping someone during a crime, but watching people backstab and foil eachother is okayfine? Besides the Survivor show letting the contestants [whatever] sleep in hotel rooms, how real do you think any of this is? Get a clue. Get a life. Reality my ass. People are getting rich from you. That's the only 'hustle'. Everytime a show is uncovered, people gasp in shock. Then they turn on the TV and get lulled back into that mindless state of ignorance... only to be fooled again. This is why I haven't turned on the TV in months. Since Mulder left... TV has lost it's purpose. Or sure, he comes back for 'guest appearances'... but it's just not the same. Everytime I see that new partner of hers, I wait for him to morph into a silver goo. Now that would be cool.
Did The Mentality Level Just Drop?
I want you to leave feeling superior. Here. Read these.
Islanders fear ghost that sodomizes it's victims as they sleep. That excuse is right up there with 'the vacuum cleaner got stuck to my neck' and 'I thought that was your belly button.... A wayward cat forced a U.S. airline to cancel a flight by clambering up into the wheel well of an aircraft and refusing to come out. "Attention passengers, your flight has been canceled so that we can save Muffy the cat." Sniff. Oh the humanity. Hahahahaha.... A poodle is suing a US vet for allegedly trying to spay her instead of cleaning her teeth. I don't know what's worse, the vet mistaking plaque removal for spaying, or the fact that the owners named the dog 'Poopi'.... Controversial naked images of men on the floor of Los Angeles International Airport have been covered with brown paper. They pay for art and then cover it up? Shit. Since ticket prices are so damn high, I think it adds romance to the reality that you're being screwed. But that's just me.... An Italian has had his left testicle off by a prostitute who claims he asked for a special service. This is the ultimate language barrier. Remember that the next time you ask someone to nibble on you balls
I'm in a funky-assed mood today. Damn! I woke up crankier Then a chick on a diet PMS-ing. After chugging a few mugs o' coffee, it mellowed me to rant mode. Woo hoo! Too bad I was too lazy to invest that time, eh? I got this off the wall [but in a nice way] email. It said, "Thank you for existing... you kind, generous soul." Now THAT'S a compliment. Then I started thinking... What did I do? So I checked out the date: May 22nd. Hmmpf. So I emailed them back and asked if I still fit the description. But hey, at one point I did, so there. Shut up. Then I get a second email about SnuffX... asking if I would host it because it's closed. I freaked and went to the site. Nope, still there. What the hell is going on with the email? Oh hell, enough about that.
Why do people act so G-d damned surprised when I tell them I haven't seen any of the reality shows? Nor do I have a desire to. You can get arrested for not helping someone during a crime, but watching people backstab and foil eachother is okayfine? Besides the Survivor show letting the contestants [whatever] sleep in hotel rooms, how real do you think any of this is? Get a clue. Get a life. Reality my ass. People are getting rich from you. That's the only 'hustle'. Everytime a show is uncovered, people gasp in shock. Then they turn on the TV and get lulled back into that mindless state of ignorance... only to be fooled again. This is why I haven't turned on the TV in months. Since Mulder left... TV has lost it's purpose. Or sure, he comes back for 'guest appearances'... but it's just not the same. Everytime I see that new partner of hers, I wait for him to morph into a silver goo. Now that would be cool.
Did The Mentality Level Just Drop?
I want you to leave feeling superior. Here. Read these.
Islanders fear ghost that sodomizes it's victims as they sleep. That excuse is right up there with 'the vacuum cleaner got stuck to my neck' and 'I thought that was your belly button.... A wayward cat forced a U.S. airline to cancel a flight by clambering up into the wheel well of an aircraft and refusing to come out. "Attention passengers, your flight has been canceled so that we can save Muffy the cat." Sniff. Oh the humanity. Hahahahaha.... A poodle is suing a US vet for allegedly trying to spay her instead of cleaning her teeth. I don't know what's worse, the vet mistaking plaque removal for spaying, or the fact that the owners named the dog 'Poopi'.... Controversial naked images of men on the floor of Los Angeles International Airport have been covered with brown paper. They pay for art and then cover it up? Shit. Since ticket prices are so damn high, I think it adds romance to the reality that you're being screwed. But that's just me.... An Italian has had his left testicle off by a prostitute who claims he asked for a special service. This is the ultimate language barrier. Remember that the next time you ask someone to nibble on you balls