Diva
04-04-02, 12:57PM
Hold On... I Gotta Flush
I walk into the restroom at work and hear someone talking low. No biggie... Chicks swarm in groups when they go to the restroom, so I figured she was talking to her friend in the stall next to her. I'm waiting for a stall, because they design bathrooms for chicks like we double park on the toilets or something. I've been in a guys' bathroom. How would you like to be touching shoulders with the guy next to you as you took a piss? I guess it would make that 'measuring up to the next guy' easier. Yeah, I know all about that. If guys had to sit and pee, you damn well better believe they'd design a fucking floor for them. I wish I could just whip it out, pee/shake and leave. What? Wash? Yeah, right. That's why the men's room needs soap replacement once a year. Anyway, the next stall opens and this chick washes and leaves. Then it dawned on me. The chicks' talking on her cell phone while taking a wiz! First of all, talking to someone and hearing them piss is just rude. Add any other sounds and it's just nasty. Then she says, 'hold on' and flushes. I don't think the bimbo realized how loud our toilets are. I hear her start saying, "huh? What sound? Must be a bad connection..." I had to bite my lip to stop from laughing. Then the chick gets snotty. "It's the connection." Yeah, most people get static, her phone gets a 'flushing' sound. Well, you know how I like causing trouble. You don't? Now you do. So I turn on the faucet full blast. She gives me a dirty look. Bad idea in general. So as she's walking out I catch up and say really loud, "Excuse me, did you leave some keys in the bathroom? There was some in the stall you came out of... " Her jaw dropped... I continued..."No? Oh, okay. I wasn't sure so I left them in there." and walked away. One of these days I'm gonna be shanked in the lady's room. 'Ladies' room. I have yet to run into a 'lady' in one. They should just call it a bitch hole.
I walk into the restroom at work and hear someone talking low. No biggie... Chicks swarm in groups when they go to the restroom, so I figured she was talking to her friend in the stall next to her. I'm waiting for a stall, because they design bathrooms for chicks like we double park on the toilets or something. I've been in a guys' bathroom. How would you like to be touching shoulders with the guy next to you as you took a piss? I guess it would make that 'measuring up to the next guy' easier. Yeah, I know all about that. If guys had to sit and pee, you damn well better believe they'd design a fucking floor for them. I wish I could just whip it out, pee/shake and leave. What? Wash? Yeah, right. That's why the men's room needs soap replacement once a year. Anyway, the next stall opens and this chick washes and leaves. Then it dawned on me. The chicks' talking on her cell phone while taking a wiz! First of all, talking to someone and hearing them piss is just rude. Add any other sounds and it's just nasty. Then she says, 'hold on' and flushes. I don't think the bimbo realized how loud our toilets are. I hear her start saying, "huh? What sound? Must be a bad connection..." I had to bite my lip to stop from laughing. Then the chick gets snotty. "It's the connection." Yeah, most people get static, her phone gets a 'flushing' sound. Well, you know how I like causing trouble. You don't? Now you do. So I turn on the faucet full blast. She gives me a dirty look. Bad idea in general. So as she's walking out I catch up and say really loud, "Excuse me, did you leave some keys in the bathroom? There was some in the stall you came out of... " Her jaw dropped... I continued..."No? Oh, okay. I wasn't sure so I left them in there." and walked away. One of these days I'm gonna be shanked in the lady's room. 'Ladies' room. I have yet to run into a 'lady' in one. They should just call it a bitch hole.