Diva
04-03-02, 11:43PM
April 17, 2001
Deep cleansing breaths... So this is my site. Like it? Love it? Hate it? Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. My friend and I were discussing male vs female orgasms. After viewing this (http://www.cbphobby.com/stuff/fake.html) {press esc to stop}. He remarked' " Looks like the guys get the short end of the stick on orgasms." To which I replied, "Yeah? Then we're even."
When Bad Toys Happen To Good People
My friend shows up the last week bearing gifts. A birthday present for me, and some presents for my cats. Shiney plastic balls. with string coming out. I thought they were great until I picked one up. Bells. It has f**king bells on the inside. Loose bells. If anyone has ever owned a cat... you know exactly what I'm thinking. Three A.M. playtime. You have two choices. yell and wake up the neighbors... Then eventually have to get up... Or get up and play chase the cat until you find/step on/trip over the damn thing. I tried to explain this to my friend. She wasn't amused. "They're toys. The cats won't do that. Just let them have something to enjoy." And with that she tossed the toys towards the cats and smiled. An evil smile. A "well now they've seen it, so you can't take it away"smile. Fine. Whatever.
I went to her house tonight for dinner. Her little rug ra... I mean son, let me in. I gave her the biggest grin and said, "I come bearing gifts! Wine for the mommy and a present for the tyke." Before she could intercept, that lil sucker had wrapping paper.. okay newspaper.. all over the place. She looked at me and asked what it was. Then she heard it. Boom Boom. I would have given my left tit to take a picture of her face at that moment. "It's a drum! A drum, mommy! I'm gonna be a drummer!" I never saw her head swivel like that. He pounded on that puppy like a right handed man who just got his arm cast removed... I whispered to my friend, "Now remember, be supportive." Then to the rat, "Look! It's got a sling so you can take it wherever you go. Road trips, family outtings.. Everone will want to hear you play!" I never cared for her family much.
Isn't it funny how friendships teeter on the edge of mortal enemies? When a stranger falls, you ask if they're okay... offer to help. Your friend? Laugh and point. Then tell everyone. When they say, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer..." It's not so you can keep an eye on them... It's so you can hurl them at your friends.
Deep cleansing breaths... So this is my site. Like it? Love it? Hate it? Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. My friend and I were discussing male vs female orgasms. After viewing this (http://www.cbphobby.com/stuff/fake.html) {press esc to stop}. He remarked' " Looks like the guys get the short end of the stick on orgasms." To which I replied, "Yeah? Then we're even."
When Bad Toys Happen To Good People
My friend shows up the last week bearing gifts. A birthday present for me, and some presents for my cats. Shiney plastic balls. with string coming out. I thought they were great until I picked one up. Bells. It has f**king bells on the inside. Loose bells. If anyone has ever owned a cat... you know exactly what I'm thinking. Three A.M. playtime. You have two choices. yell and wake up the neighbors... Then eventually have to get up... Or get up and play chase the cat until you find/step on/trip over the damn thing. I tried to explain this to my friend. She wasn't amused. "They're toys. The cats won't do that. Just let them have something to enjoy." And with that she tossed the toys towards the cats and smiled. An evil smile. A "well now they've seen it, so you can't take it away"smile. Fine. Whatever.
I went to her house tonight for dinner. Her little rug ra... I mean son, let me in. I gave her the biggest grin and said, "I come bearing gifts! Wine for the mommy and a present for the tyke." Before she could intercept, that lil sucker had wrapping paper.. okay newspaper.. all over the place. She looked at me and asked what it was. Then she heard it. Boom Boom. I would have given my left tit to take a picture of her face at that moment. "It's a drum! A drum, mommy! I'm gonna be a drummer!" I never saw her head swivel like that. He pounded on that puppy like a right handed man who just got his arm cast removed... I whispered to my friend, "Now remember, be supportive." Then to the rat, "Look! It's got a sling so you can take it wherever you go. Road trips, family outtings.. Everone will want to hear you play!" I never cared for her family much.
Isn't it funny how friendships teeter on the edge of mortal enemies? When a stranger falls, you ask if they're okay... offer to help. Your friend? Laugh and point. Then tell everyone. When they say, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer..." It's not so you can keep an eye on them... It's so you can hurl them at your friends.