Special Announcement

[Unforgiven]

I would like to announce this here first, amongst friends (sort of, anyway). We've all heard the talk about who's running for president. Hillary, Obama, Edwards... what you haven't heard is...



http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/6718/unfyforpresiz1.png


Vote for Unforgiven! Why? To start with:

+ I've never started a war.
+ I've never been an alcoholic.
+ I did inhale.
+ I support the constitution as the foundation of all other laws.
+ I support the right to free speech. The real thing, not the current "free speech".
+ I won't try to get you in a secret prison or killed in some sandy country with oil.
+ I don't claim to hear the voice of God telling me to kill people.
+ I can pronounce "nuclear". Usually.
+ The fish and I *do* coexist peacefully.

Vote for rational though rather than superficial religious catch phrases. Vote for carefully considered decisions by informed people rather than "using the internets".

Vote for Unfy.

[fosul]

He's got my vote.

[JakeD]

Best thread ever. You have my vote, even if you are a filthy Jew-lover.

EDIT: OH SHIT I'M A FILTHY JEW LOVER TOO

[Zachola]

He's got my vote.

Count me in, too.

[Unforgiven]

Fellow countrymen, your support means much to me, and I'm glad to know that there are still fine people like yourselves that can make a difference in '08. To further this cause, however, will take more than just the best president this country has seen since Lincoln (that'd be me, by the way).

For these reason, and with great pleasure, I'd like to also announce the formation of a new political party, dedicated to the same ideals and philosophies that I intend to bring to the White House.

The Red Stapler Party. You heard me right. I'm sure you've all seen Office Space. Depicted in it is an usual man named Milton, who isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, constantly asking his manager if he has his stapler, all the while knowing he does.

You see, the stapler isn't just a fascinating paper-fastening device. This stapler is the symbol of Milton's freedom, dignity, and self-respect. By taking this stapler, the manager shows his unquestionable domination, disrespect, disregard, and disinterest in Milton. Milton, on the other hand, can be seen as a symbol of how Authority sees it's subjects. Stupid, unrefined, and useless except to further their own goals.

This is what they are doing to the people, and this is what we're fighting against. It's time we take back our stapler, ladies and gentlemen. It is time we take it back and never let them take it again. It's time for the Red Stapler Party.

Please, join us in asking... no, *telling* Washington:

"I believe you have my stapler."

[Sean]

in all honesty, that was brilliant...

[pepe le pew]

heheh can i vote?? even if i am not and have never been in america??

[Bones]

You forgot about something.
My Barbarian Horde Party is going to sweep into power and I shall be President. You don't stand a chance.:hijack:

[Amaurote]

Sorry, there's no way I'm voting for someone who peacefully co-exists with fish, and frankly I think it's an insult to the armed forces that you're walking around dressed like a Blues Brother.

[entipy]

The Red Stapler Party

:lolrotf:

[whitecrow]

/cant vote
//will vote for unfy
///twice

[pilsbury]

Errr not for me, never trust a man with "child molester" Glasses

[Amaurote]

What about a child molester with man glasses?

[Unforgiven]

heheh can i vote?? even if i am not and have never been in america??

Why not? Dead people vote republican all the time.

I very literally laughed out loud at Am's "Blues Brother" comment.

[HeavensAngel]

Im gonna vote for ya just cuz ya look so sexy in that tie :p

[Unforgiven]

Im gonna vote for ya just cuz ya look so sexy in that tie :p

If that's your reason, come to Detroit and you can do much more than just vote for me.

[Amaurote]

http://shadowmage.plinkomedia.com/images/Admiral-Ackbar-trap.jpg

[Unforgiven]

I think someone's going to get a shipment of polonium in their tea when I get elected.

[entipy]

You'll never get elected.

[Amaurote]

Either I'm going to need a giant cup of tea, or Mr Unfy's going to have to use a teeny-tiny ship.

[Unforgiven]

Either I'm going to need a giant cup of tea, or Mr Unfy's going to have to use a teeny-tiny ship.

Teeny-tiny ships are part of my strategy to minimize fuel use, and lower gas prices.

[Amaurote]

You could probably lower the birthrate by posting pictures of Paul Wolfowitz in subways.

[Poseidon]

You could probably lower the birthrate by posting pictures of Paul Wolfowitz in subways.

he could just post his own....

[Unforgiven]

That was plan B. Have to get that birth rate down.

[Bassmama]

What's 'polonium'?

Hell- I'll vote for ya- 'cause you're kinda purty & all.

I have a better party for you to be a member of- the Nekkid Party! WOO-HOO!!!

[Bones]

You'll never get elected.

Of course not. The Barbarian Horde Party is going to win all elections. And if not , we will just go on a berserker rampage and take everything anyway.

[NurseNancy]

I can't vote for Unfy...without betraying The Barbarian Horde!!
:( (and with the Barbarian Horde...we get to run around naked and stuff:D )

Sorry, Unfy!

[Bones]

I can't vote for Unfy...without betraying The Barbarian Horde!!
:( (and with the Barbarian Horde...we get to run around naked and stuff:D )

Sorry, Unfy!

And I promised to make her Secretary of Health and Sex Education.

[Bones]

Unfy, I notice a flaw in your strategy. You have to be 35 years old to be President. Your not even close. I however will be old enough in time for the next election. So why not join THE BARBARIAN HORDE PARTY? I'll give you a nice cabinet position that involves drunken barbarian wenches. :mm:

[Bassmama]

Unfy, I notice a flaw in your strategy. You have to be 35 years old to be President. Your not even close. I however will be old enough in time for the next election. So why not join THE BARBARIAN HORDE PARTY? I'll give you a nice cabinet position that involves drunken barbarian wenches. :mm:

I want to know- WHAT "position" are you going to give Boozer?

[Bones]

I want to know- WHAT "position" are you going to give Boozer?

Seeing as to how our first order of business is to invade Cuba and turn it into a nudist colony, I'll make him Governor General of Cuba. :rude:

[Unforgiven]

Age requirement? Man, you don't even have to be elected anymore. I don't think an age requirement is going to stop me.

[Bones]

I thought you believed in Constitutional Law. THE BARBARIAN HORDE doesn't.

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y263/Bones2112/barbarianhorde2008.jpg

[Boozer]

Seeing as to how our first order of business is to invade Cuba and turn it into a nudist colony, I'll make him Governor General of Cuba. :rude:

What did I do to you?:mad:

[trekbugging]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bones




Seeing as to how our first order of business is to invade Cuba and turn it into a nudist colony, I'll make him Governor General of Cuba.



What did I do to you?

you would be mad to be govenour of a nudist colony??

well maybe because it would be in Cuba...

[Bones]

What did I do to you?:mad:

Dude!!!! Cuban cigars, good Rum and naked women. I'm doing you a favor. :angel:


Did I mention the culling of all Cuban men?

[Bassmama]

Boozer- when you get to Cuba, I want to be your guest! The FISHING there is AWESOME!!!!

[Bones]

Boozer- when you get to Cuba, I want to be your guest! The FISHING there is AWESOME!!!!

SEE!!!! I said I was doing him a favor.:D

[fosul]

Unfy for president!

[JakeD]

And hey, he's already chosen Cabinet members in anticipation!


http://img222.imageshack.us/img222/4882/wtfuq8.jpg
Secretary of State

http://img262.imageshack.us/img262/1665/marketformoarup4.jpg
Secretary of the Treasury

http://img102.imageshack.us/img102/3847/americafuckyeahzq1.jpg
Press Secretary


http://img401.imageshack.us/img401/4017/whatnu9iz9.jpg
Secretary of Defense


http://img160.imageshack.us/img160/9950/1194593632726pn0.jpg
Secretary of Homeland Security


http://img128.imageshack.us/img128/9062/aaaaaaaaadq9.gif
Attorney General


http://img219.imageshack.us/img219/6150/mexicanhahauseinternetim9.gif
Secretary of Agriculture

http://img108.imageshack.us/img108/4131/wtfmudkipfg6.png
Secretary of Education

And last but not least, the first pet!
http://img239.imageshack.us/img239/5030/wharrgarblfz3.jpg

Looks like the campaign's off to a great start, kids!

[kittyroze]

May I be the secretary of offense?

[Bassmama]

May I be the secretary of offense?
No- I already got that one- I can offend just about anyone without trying too hard. You can be co secretary, though! If there are 2 of us, you can get anyone I miss!!!

[Unforgiven]

You forgot my press secretary and my replacement for Air Force One.

[JakeD]

You forgot my press secretary and my replacement for Air Force One.

Uh, press secretary's right there in the American flag shirt, retard. Are you sure you're bright enough to be our fearless leader?

[Unforgiven]

Uh, press secretary's right there in the American flag shirt, retard. Are you sure you're bright enough to be our fearless leader?

Did I mention that under my leadership, Gitmo will remain open? It'll be smaller though, just for people like you.

[Bones]

And once again I have to remind you that the Horde will be in charge.

[thestarsfall]

what can I be?

[Bones]

Join The Horde and I'll think of something.

[Unforgiven]

what can I be?

I'd tell you, but Sean is here. Maybe another... more intimate... setting...

[Sean]

Sexratary of the Oval Office? :rant:

[Boozer]

Bones, just give me upstate NY and I'll be happy. I'll kick most of the people out and make it Al's Nature Preserve, where the wildlife population is controlled by slot limits, WMPs that make sense, and people that actually know thing or two about the environment. Every Thursday, FRIDAY AND Saturday night will be Beer, pizza and wings night, and major sporting events, your birthday, and "just 'cuz" days are all state mandated holidays.

[Bones]

Bones, just give me upstate NY and I'll be happy. I'll kick most of the people out and make it Al's Nature Preserve, where the wildlife population is controlled by slot limits, WMPs that make sense, and people that actually know thing or two about the environment. Every Thursday, FRIDAY AND Saturday night will be Beer, pizza and wings night, and major sporting events, your birthday, and "just 'cuz" days are all state mandated holidays.

Dude!!! You get to be Secretary of State. And every July 17th will be Get Boozer Drunk Day.

Find me a six and a half foot tall red headed oriental lady and you can be Vice- President.

[Unforgiven]

Sexratary of the Oval Oral Office? :rant:

Not a bad idea, thanks for the suggestion. Twitch, report to Detroit at once.

[JakeD]

Find me a six and a half foot tall red headed oriental lady and you can be Vice- President.

Oriental? Is she part rug or part ramen? :P

(it's Asian, for future reference. You will be savaged by Asians for referring to them as Oriental.)

[Bones]

(it's Asian, for future reference. You will be savaged by Asians for referring to them as Oriental.)

As long as they are six and a half foot tall, red headed. and female I don't mind at all.

[thestarsfall]

Oriental? Is she part rug or part ramen? :P

(it's Asian, for future reference. You will be savaged by Asians for referring to them as Oriental.)

But they live in the Oriental Biome...

but then I guess we would be the Nearctics then....

[Unforgiven]

It's been a while, and I thought some of you might be interested in seeing your future president's new car (and its driver).

[Amaurote]

Tonka meets Barbie.

[Unforgiven]

I couldn't help but notice that none of the election results I saw record a single vote for me. Thanks for all the helps, you filthy jerks!

RED STAPLER PARTY IN 2012!

[James]

none of the election results I saw record a single vote for me.

So... even you didn't vote for yourself? :D

[Bassmama]

:lolrotf: :lolrotf: :lolrotf: :lolrotf: :lolrotf:

[Bones]

I couldn't help but notice that none of the election results I saw record a single vote for me. Thanks for all the helps, you filthy jerks!

RED STAPLER PARTY IN 2012!

I got two votes.

BARBARIAN HORDE IN 2012!!

[Unforgiven]

I did vote for myself, which only goes to show the sort of election reform we need here, and that the Red Stapler Party can accomplish.

[Teslus]

Unforgiven said that I HAVE TO COME HERE.

My cousin's son is two, and I decided to ask him what he wanted for Christmas. After a second of deliberation, he said:

"Obama."

I told him that I wasn't asking him who he wanted for President, but what he wanted for Christmas. Along that same line, I decided to see if he could answer the question properly. I asked who he wanted for President. His answer was:

"Toys...trains."

Vote Toys-Trains in 2012!

[Isotrip]

Sweet

I am voting Toys - Trains!!!!!

[James]

Sweet

I am voting Toys - Trains!!!!!

"Toys - Trains" is far more qualified to run a country than any of the current politicians, so I'm going to have to agree with you.

[Reliquiae]

"Toys - Trains" are the ANTICHRIST I hear! The Bible says so!!!!

The sky is falling! The sky is falling! Waaaaaaagghhhhh!!!

[Isotrip]

Hey!!!

Keep your religeon outta our Politics!!! :p

[James]

Keep your RELIgeon outta [...]

I lol'd

[Reliquiae]

hahaha! Schweet!!!!!!!!!!! :angeldevi

[Isotrip]

TOYS and TRAINS 2012!!!

and Reli is the ANTI-Christ!!!

[JakeD]

What the fuck? Bunghole/Bitchcakes 2012 for the win.

[Reliquiae]

I always knew that the end of the world would come down to Unf and I...

[Bassmama]

I get to run the Ice Cream Stand in hell!

[Isotrip]

I'll be the Bus Driver!

[Mr. Bojangles]

What the fuck? Bunghole/Bitchcakes 2012 for the win.



Isn't that what we were all calling the McCain/Palin Ticket?

[JakeD]

Sortakindamaybesure.

[Isotrip]

Sortakindamaybesure.

absofreakinlutelymanimaginepalinrunningforthepresi dentialticketin2012holyshitalkaboutbad